Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Freak Show Goes to the Airborne, Texas




"Stan Jiniski's Psychedelic Freak Show" made good money during the four month run in Las Brisas. Stan and Glennis were able to buy a new Black 1959 Cadillac coupe convertible Stan painted the name and logos of the show on the side of his car. The show's name, "Stan Jiniskis' Psychedelic Freak Show"the words in red on the Black Cadillac encircled the logos, a top-hat wearing skull, smoking a cigar, flaming.

The rest of the money was invested in the show, trucks, old school buses, the seats replaced with beds and bunks. All trucks and buses were converted to run on Natural Gas, extra tanks were fitted on racks wielded outside of the busses. Hunketree, the AOWL sailor got a notice that he was getting a section 8 discharge and to pick it up in San Diego. That was good news for him and his midget lady family, Chica, Bonita and Marie, (the foursome slept together every-night).

Hunketree even got a discharge check from the Navy and bought a used 57 burgundy flake colored Cadillac four door . People love to stare at midgets. Worst, Hunketree looked junked-out, like Popeye.

The show would have trouble at the border, Chica, Bonita and Marie were illegals. Turd on the Run was on the run. Leo was from Spain.

Stan would have to go to Mexico City and spend hours in government offices or just make a run for it over the border into the USA.

Stan choose without hesitation to do the runner.

Making the runner was going to involve logistics and planning. Water, beans, flower, cooking oil would have to be stored in the trucks and busses. Stan would use the same invasion technique Swartzkoph used to invade Iraq. " The End Around Sweep". The caravan would move on low moonbeam nights only, with the vehicles lights taped, running roughly 250 miles SE of Brownsville towards the North Star!

All the Mojo that Stan, Chica, Turd on the Run, Coke the albino Leopard (and many others) from their hearts and beautiful rays shared with Mexican friends and audience drained them at times. The freak crew was apprehensive, Americans weren't as cool as Mexicans somehow. Who knows how the tea -party crowds might take the show?

By traveling in the dark, and avoiding border cops, eventually reaching 30 miles into the darkness of the jet black desert. Outside the coolest looking town, first things first, Stan would begin by forging some documents that would act as a International Drivers License, international horizon-permits and such.

And there on the horizon like a phoenix ready to rise from it's ashes, "Stans Psychedelic Freak Show" sets up as morning rises, ready to glow hallows and blow the minds of the people of Airborne, Texas.

It was a though the show landed like a UFO, 30 miles in the desert outside of Airborne, Texas. Or maybe it was like the show had always been there anyway.

The freak crew worked all night unloading planks, canvas, ropes, spikes, wood, lights, generators, costumes. Coke the albino Leopard slept the night though.

The local Sheriff, Sheriff Vester Buttrose. They called him Sheriff Buttrose, was invited by Stan the following night, for a drink of some fancy Berber honey beer. The two old boys jawed for awhile, after a few drinks, they agreed that the International Permits would meet Airborne local standards, and the show wouldn't be censored or disturbed by the Airborne authorities. The Catch-22 was that Sheriff Buttrose wanted a 15% take after every nights show. Stan seemed to be cool with that.

Airborne: POP 123,000, was home to the desert training center of the US Army as well as having a hot dog and a computer factory. Both factories employed Mexicans only. On all levels from management down. Mexicans were the heart of "Stan's Psychedelic Freak Show" it was their show. The enlisted men from the Army training center would come for a chance to see some tit, drink some Mescal, buy weed from Leo.

So the numbers were there, the Mayor, Buttrose, was paid off, they made it over the border, Stan figured this one was in the bag.

Opening night: Blue lights lit up the inside and outside of the painted tent skin. Illuminating Glennis's esoteric and wicked art work. As usual, packed, the Mexicans as always cool loved the show while the enlisted men were subdued, mellow, with the equalizing spiritual effect of the ganja and mescal calming their nature.

The Roster for Tonights so would be rearranged by Stan and Glennis, who by now was Stan's wife and co-owner of the show.
1. Chica, Bonita and Marie the tattooed midget women would come out and have a wrastling match, they would go into the audience and dump popcorn on the Mexicans and take their cotton candy away, take tokes off the from the enlisted mens ganja, and the enlightened men would give the hot midget girls sips from their mescal (Stan encouraged pot smoking at his shows). As usual, Stan the ring master, (wearing red riding jodhpurs, engineer boots, a tux shirt and his Captains hat embroidered with a gold skull and bones) would run into the audience for suspense, pick up all three of the tattooed little ones, to save the Mexican audience and the enlisted-men from the abuse and carry the lady midget wrastlers out of the tent.
2. Quinn would come to center stage, tie himself into a knot and offer 25$ to anyone in the audience who could untie him. A few of the enlisted-men tried and failed, because of Quinns great strength, he could have been the strongman but Stan didn't schedule it.
3. Turd on the Run would come to center stage holding a live white rat, hold it up by its tale, place it's head into his mouth and eat it.
4. Glennis the tattooed lady would come out topless wearing only a bikini bottom ( the enlisted men would go crazy screaming and whistling), Glennis would hang up side down from a line, blue light focused, giving her tattoos a third dimension, all the time extending her arms straight out horizontally, looking like a upside down occult cross.
5. Even Hunketree the sailor got in on the show, he would come to center this time with a blow up love doll, human size in a white wedding dress, gluing a lit splib in her suggestive open mouth, kissing the doll with his mouth open taking mouth hits from the splib, dancing with her, The Mexicans and enlisted- men liked it.

Then unexpectedly, from the center stage entrance, ENTER, The Weird Reverend Cornelius Cornhole and his flock swinging bibles about. The inside of the tent reeked of ganja. When Rev. Cornhole and his flock walked in raising their bibles like weapons. The air was so thick you could cut it with a dull razor.

Once in center stage with the power of Jesus, all the bibles held up and finger pointing by the flock , Cornhole delivered a "Damn Nation" sermon, lambasting the show suggesting pillorying of the audience one by one. Speaking of the pits of Hell, telling the audience they were on the road to hell and should repent now. Describing the high connected and communal psychedelic feeling of the audience, as the Devil himself.

Out of nowhere Stan the ringmaster walks in and he obviously didn't think Cornhole's schtick was funny, AT ALL!

Stan walks into Coke the Albino Leopard's cage, Coke a lousy show-cat jumps on Stan and starts licking his face. Stan gently pushes Coke and says "off boy". He then reached for Leo's bullwhip and walks sharply up to Cornhole and his flock, ripping the pages of the bibles out, using skillful snaps from his bullwhip, causing the bibles to fly in the air, Stan did exactly that to 6 of the parishioners and finally, Cornhole shut up. Stan then dress's-down Cornhole telling him that he wasn't spiritual or high enough to understand or partake in the energy of the show.

Stan scared the bejesus out of Cornhole and his flock, looked Reverend Cornhole straight it the eye with his intense black eyes and says, get off the grounds of the "Stan Jiniski Psychedelic Freak Show" or he and 123 enlisted-men ( who were all backing Stan), would escort them to the exit.

Reverend Cornelius Cornhole and his flock left the same way they came in, minus a few bibles, with a hang dog look on their faces.

6. The closing act was the " Leopard Tamer " . Chica would stand outside the dried mesquite cage holding a plate of apple pie a la mode, Coke would stare at the pie intently, growling and looking ferocious long enough for Leo to hold up a chair and crack his bullwhip a couple of times. When they let Coke out of the cage he would go eat his pie. After the pie he was cool and the kids could come down to pet him.

Stan's and Glennis's show became a standard in Airborne, Texas. Freak folks from all over Texas would drive thousands of miles in vans and on Harley's to see the show. Famous personalities Sonny Barger and Terry the Tramp (Rest in peace the coolest brother ever man!) and the Oakland Chapter of the Hells Angels even came to see the show one night. The Angel's couldn't stop laughing and loved drinking mescal. The enlisted-men would come every-night, just to smoke ganja and get a look at Glennis's tit, or the midget girls big asses. Stan would send boxes of 10$ bills back to the store, the Jiniski Brooklyn Pawnshop, to be put in the safe. So all and all, the magic exuded by the troupe, the blue lights, Glennis's paintings on the canapé, being aloud to smoke dope during the show, the awesome charismatic ambience......... made it a success.

Aside: Last word from ~FL~ the show is still playing in Airborne, take your ma, take your pa, TAKE LA REVOLUTION!

No comments: